Love and Politics. Close & Personal with Andrew Barr

When Andrew Barr and Anthony Toms entered into their civil partnership in 2009, neither of them where wearing a dress. When they first met, Anthony was visiting Canberra with some friends, ditched them in Civic and told the taxi driver to take him to a gay bar. The driver delivered Anthony to the Meridian in Braddon.

That same night, Andrew Barr was making his first ever visit to the same place. Andrew had been out of his closet for a few months and, taking his friend’s advice, he ventured out into the gay world for the first time. 

It was to prove a very important outing.

Like other love stories, the one belonging to Andrew and Anthony has some little miracles. The first is that at the time they met they were both with the same mobile phone company. The morning after the night before, Andrew timidly texted Anthony with a little message, and if they’d had different phone companies, the text would not have arrived.

After 18 months of commuting between Canberra, where Andrew lived, and Newcastle and Wollongong, where Anthony lived, Andrew was offered a prestigious job with the newly elected Bracks Labor Government in Melbourne.  He knew that if he took the job it would mean his relationship with Anthony was over, so he turned it down.

By the beginning of 2001 Andrew had established himself in a great private sector job and managed to lure Anthony to Canberra. They moved in together into a one bedroom apartment in Braddon.

These days they live in domestic bliss with their two four-legged children – Jasmine Toms-Barr and Marky Barr-Toms. Both cats have found them, not the other way around, and Marky (a very clever cat) has his own Facebook page.

But this story begins in the dark halls of the Australian Labor Party, ACT Branch, where Andrew Barr is a mover and a shaker. At 26 years-of-age, Andrew was on his way to a stellar political career, having just being elected the President of ACT Young Labor.  Six weeks after his election, he came out of his closet.  He was not the first gay man in the ALP, but by the reaction he received from some unexpected quarters, you’d think that Andrew was the first openly gay person in the world.

During this difficult time Andrew found support from some very unexpected colleagues and friends, and was also saddened to lose friends over it.

Andrew Barr and his partner Anthony Toms 2009

Andrew had known he was gay for eleven years before he came out, and in that time he’d had his share of relationships with women.  He always wondered why he could be their best friend, yet have the worst sex of his life.  After he came out to himself, all this made perfect sense.

When he came out Andrew chose to leave his job as a Labor Party staffer because he was in such an emotional state.  Every day he had to go to work with ALP colleagues and came face to face with people whose politics professed inclusivity and support, yet their actions were showing the exact opposite. 

Everywhere he went people were talking about him — about what he was wearing, about his haircut and mindless and unending gossip and innuendo about who he was sleeping with.

In 2009 Andrew was the ACT Member for Molonglo and has a long record of support for equal rights for LGBTIQ+ Canberrans; the reproductive rights of women; multiculturalism and the humanitarian treatment of refugees.

After six months things calmed down and Andrew took up a career opportunity with the Stanhope Labor Government, working on that Government’s law reform program.

It was the first step back into the fold of the ALP for Andrew, who had been a life-long supporter and worker for the cause.

Now he is Canberra’s first openly gay member of the Legislative Assembly and Cabinet Minister. Yet, there are still some in the community who think he shouldn’t have a view on some things because of his “lifestyle”.  For instance, some believe that he shouldn’t have views about children or young people because he is unlikely to have children of his own. 

When speaking about the current political climate in the ACT, Andrew is of the opinion that Civil Unions are unlikely to become law in the ACT while the current Prime Minister continues to occupy the Lodge. There is a possibility of this being revisited, however. 

If a State Government passes legislation, which takes the Relationship Register further than the legislation currently does in Tasmania and the ACT, the Commonwealth will not be able to do anything to interfere or change it.

In that situation the ACT will then be able to pass similar legislation.  According to Andrew, it’s all unfinished business.  Social change, he says, is not easy.

We have to cop the good with the bad.  Hopefully the Government will bring these changes in with some compassion and a gentle hand.  The Centrelink database will identify relationships that may not be known or that may not be ready to be known.

There are times when Andrew feels pressure from the GLBTQ community.  For instance, he’s been personally accused of being responsible for closing the gates at Black Mountain Peninsula.  But that had more to do with vanadalism from burnouts than any other after hours activities.

But back to the important questions.

Andrew says he doesn’t want to be a politician when he’s fifty.  His dream job then would be to run a coffee shop which also sells books and CDs... by the beach.  Either that or he’ll become one of those dreaded lobbyists, telling the politicians what to do instead of the other way around.

The interview finished on two important points.

Firstly, Andrew’s porn name would be Ruby Gordon (his first pets name and the first street he lived in) and he would turn straight for Myff Warhurst.  What more do you need to know? 

Nelida Contreras is a facebook junkie, a lover of words who would love the opportunity to tell the world your story, a mum of two very lovely cherubs, a servant of the public, and a woman who dresses as a man who sometimes dresses as a woman.  She loves a good laugh, a good bit of dark chocolate and is madly in love with Uber Dyke.

FUSE01 APRIL 2009